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Girltalk: quarter life crisis

01/08/2018

Raise your hands if you can relate:

 

“When I was a little girl, I expect I would be married, have a cool job, and own a house by 26.”

 

And now, after graduating, the reality is saying back, “Ha. That’s never going to happen.”

 

Then, you see your friends having the best job ever, getting married, and living abroad. It seems like they’re living their dreams, and here you are, not having a single clue of what to do. You feel like you’ve given everything you have, working overtime, but you’re underpaid. You feel like he’s the one for you, but deep down, you start to doubt, “Is he?”

 

Then, you start to question everything about your life. Is this the life you should be living?

 

Babe, you’re not alone. 3 out of 4 people in the room feels the same way too, according to a Linkedin research.

 

This is totally normal. We’re so used to being told what to do by our parents. Now that we are forced to make big decisions about our careers and relationships, it’s only natural to feel confused.

 

“So that angst is exactly what you’re supposed to be doing in order to grow. The people who are doing the best are suffering personal angst in their 20s because that is how you find out who you are,” stated Penelope Trunk, co-founder of Brazen Carrerist.

 

In fact, if you’re feeling this way, you’re smart and ambitious.

 

“The typical sufferer is “highly driven and smart, but struggling because they feel they’re not achieving their potential or feeling they’re falling behind,” says Nathan Gehlert, Ph.D., a Washington D.C. psychologist.

 

So, what can you do about this?

 

1. Talk to your girlfriends who will listen and won’t judge.

They might not have the answers because, hell, there’s a good chance they’re in the same boat. At least you feel like you’re not alone.

 

2. “Wander where the wifi is weak.”

LOL. That sounds totally cliche, but we’re not kidding. If possible, be alone. You want the time and space to really think without any influence.

 

3. Explore the things you’ve always wanted to do. Go all out.

If you want A, even if it’s not related to your degree, that’s totally okay. It’s better to do it and fail rather that regret not trying it later.

 

4. Seek out a mentor who is not your boss.

That way, you can be totally honest about your job and get a totally constructive feedback.

 

5. Okay with not having the answer right now.

It’s part of the process.

 

*sending you a virtual hug

 

Written by Helena Natasha.